Adoption language

Do over: “I’m a bastard, right, Mom?”

March 24, 2011

As you may recall from my last post, Tessa and I began a conversation about the meaning of the words bitch and bastard. We covered the terms and I was feeling confident. Until she said the words expressed in the title of this post. That means I’m a bastard, right? Though it was clear there was [...]

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Adoption: a tough question from my daughter

March 22, 2011

I’m interested in what parents and non-parents have to say and particularly what helpful advice adoptees may have to offer. What would/did you do? The conversation started when Tessa, 9, asked me (again) what bitch means and if it’s a bad word. We’ve had this talk before. I told her (again) that the dictionary meaning is [...]

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What does “real” mean: adoption talk with my daughter

December 23, 2010

We were thrilled last summer to hear that my son’s birth mom had put us on her itinerary during her visit to Colorado.  Reed hadn’t had contact with her in nearly 4 years, and for the first time he would meet his half-siblings, ages 3 and 1. Reed showed no signs of either distress or [...]

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Precision with words

December 12, 2008

Tessa and Reed are on the road to becoming literate. I try to make sure that the reading material that comes within range of their eyeballs is suitable, but I can’t control all the words in the world. You would think street signs would be innocuous, but think again. Here are just a few of [...]

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Adopt a this, adopt a that

February 13, 2008

My friend (and owner of a private community for adoptive parents and hopeful adoptive parents) Joanne has a terrific post about one aspect of adoption language and its effect on a child of adoption. Here’s an excerpt of a letter Joanne sent to her daughter’s Girl Scout leader a couple of months ago: “Shawna told [...]

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How to help new parents and waiting parents

December 15, 2007

A link to an article arrived in my Inbox. The title is My Adopted Child Can Hear You (fitting with my Words Matter theme) but the content also touches on what new adoptive parents really need when they bring home their child. I’m including this here because the Stirrup Queen community seems to be blessed [...]

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